My Friend's Son: Intro

I recently met with a young man to help him with his self-awareness, communication, and overall social confidence. He showed up to our meeting with eight specific questions he had prepared in advance. As soon as he began to ask these questions, I quickly realized I was not only going to have the privilege to do a little teaching, I was also going to have the opportunity to do some serious listening, reflecting, and learning.

This young man is wonderfully unique, has a brilliant mind, and is wired in a way that can make certain social interactions somewhat difficult and challenging at times. He’s also just like most of us in that, he wants to be seen, heard, and understood, he’d like to make a positive impression on others, and he has a desire to feel comfortable and confident in social settings.

His well-prepared questions got me questioning how we as leaders, teachers, coaches, and presenters can improve our own self-awareness, communication, and overall social confidence, especially if we approach this process with a similar courage, honesty, and vulnerability.

With all that said - and with his approval - below are the eight questions from the wonderfully unique and brilliant mind of… my friend’s son.

• How can I better influence how I am perceived by others?
• What are the best methods I can use to improve my ability as a storyteller?
• How can I remain interesting in conversations, without always relying on trying to be funny?
  What is the best way for me to be the best version of myself every day, and amplify my best qualities as a person?
• What are some visual signals I can look for to gauge how a person is reacting to what I am saying in a conversation?
• How can I adapt my sense of humor to be one where, instead of looking to laugh at people, I first seek to laugh with them?
• How can I control my facial reactions so I can be perceived the way I want, while also being able to conceal my true feelings when necessary?
• How do I build confidence in myself to the point where I have the ability to start a conversation with anyone, without getting too nervous or feeling awkward?

By requesting to meet, preparing in advance, showing a genuine desire to improve, and asking good and honest questions, this young man showed a level of vulnerability, courage, and awareness that I’ve very rarely seen in my 27 years of communication, public speaking, and connection training.

My hope in sharing some of these questions - and in recounting this entire experience - is that we can all learn from this intentional approach, so we can all improve our own self-awareness, communication, and overall social confidence.

This was truly one of the most meaningful and memorable experiences I’ve had in years, and I don’t just say that because it happened to be with… my friend’s son.