Confessions of an Anxious Flyer

A message from Erin...

I have shared a "confession" in the past that your girl is an awkward networker. So I figured I would share another one with you: I'm an anxious flyer. 

I freely acknowledge that it's a control issue rooted in a fear of the unknown and a sense of powerlessness over my situation. That said, I never want it to be something that gets in my way personally or professionally. So with a lot of turbulence forecast research, some rituals, and a long series of combat breathing, I hop on flights regularly and sit as an anxious ball of energy for most of the flight. 

Last year I had a flight out of Sarasota that was delayed many times over because of bad weather on our flight path. Eventually, we got the all-clear, boarded the flight...and I was a bit of a mess. This was a very last minute trip so I didn't have time to prepare myself mentally (which may have been for the best). 

As my anxiety was climbing while I waited for us to taxi, the pilot emerged from the cockpit with his tablet in hand and a big smile on his face. He gave a full visual run down of his flight plan and how he was avoiding the bumps. He reassured us that, although it would be a longer flight, he was intent on getting us into smooth air so we could rest and relax on our late night flight. He was kind, calm, funny, and attentive, providing this anxious gal with some much-needed peace. It's also important to note that I think this was the kindest flight crew I've ever experienced. We made it safely to our destination without a single incident of turbulence. 

So where I cannot offer expertise into quelling flight anxiety, I can give insight into how to build trust with someone navigating uncertainty and anxiety:

1. Be intentional. Intentionality requires time. The pilot could have just continued with pre-flight checks (or whatever it is pilots do in the minutes before pushing off), but took time to introduce himself and give a face to the man behind the curtain. This investment of time made a world of difference in moving the trust needle, and that's an investment worth making. 

2. Give clarity. When things are outside of our control, it's nice to know when the person who is in control has a clear and decided plan. Where I am sure (I hope...) flight teams have a plan to navigate challenges and turbulence, communicating that plan with calm and clarity builds confidence in those who are sitting in ambiguity. Just tell me why the seatbelt sign is turned on. 

3. Demonstrate care. Empathy is an important component of genuine care. The acknowledgment that "the path isn't always going to be smooth, we have thought of mitigation strategies, and we are right here with you," sets realistic expectations and reminds us we are not alone. But sometimes words alone don't hit the mark - come out of the cockpit, show us the map, give a reassuring smile, and crack a joke. Visibility, clarity, kindness, and humor are a beautiful and contagious combination. 

I've thought about this moment many times over the year (especially on less-than-stellar flights). When we are leading and serving others - whether it's our families, our teams, our clients, building trust is essential and intentionality, clarity, and genuine care go a long way in building that trust.

Fly on.